A Snake's Mistake
by Azure Gryphon
Summary: Someone has played a rotten prank on Harry. His girlfriend seems to like it, and every one else too. But, they don't know what his new pervy pet snake really is. Semi bestiality. H/Multi. Others/Multi Slash and Het. Mentions MPreg. Veela Draco, Lucius.
1. Chapter 1

Written 6-21-2011

Warnings: A great deal of sexual stuff including but not necessarily limited to: masturbation, future bestiality with a snake, male Veela, slash of the male on male variety and heterosexual relations.

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There were five. One - the smallest - was a pale, gleaming gold. Two were black and resembled marble, though one was solid black and the other had a charcoal colored swirl. The largest, though no larger than a large hen's egg, nearly glowed in the sunlight like a scarlet ruby. The last however was the most unsettling, as it visibly glowed Killing Curse green even in the light.

Harry glared across the bedspread at the smug, unnatural snake.

"_How in the world did you get pregnant_?" He demanded.

"_Mate…pretty eyesss…"_The snake hissed smugly.

"_How the bloody hell can you be so, so… Bloody hell! You are going to be a parent_!" He shouted. He fell back against his pillows, still staring at the snake. The snake that was not, in actuality, a snake. The snake that was really a detached and enchanted piece of his body. He scrubbed his face with his hands.

"Bloody hell… I'm going to be a father…" Harry groaned. Those eggs were his kids. Snakes, probably, but his kids none the less and he didn't know how it was possible. The snake could not possibly be anything but male considering what it was made from- but how could it get pregnant if that were true. And what did that mean about wizarding males in general… He wrested his mind from that horror filled thought. Nest, err… next topic- it takes two to make babies… eggs? Baby snakes in eggs?

"_And whose are they?" _He hissed at the snake. It was almost looking uncomfortable at his scrutiny, which certainly had never happened before.

"_Pretty eyesss?" _It hissed weakly, as though this was a good excuse for the fact that Harry was now a father. By individuals, no less, that he knew not.

How am I going to find out who the other guys…other guys got my thing pregnant… Lost in horror at the thought that some random guy… possibly multiple random guys had penetrated his currently free willed and scaly penis and knocked it up, he lost track of his snake. Sensing the opportunity to distract its … owner… the snake slithered up his leg and began butting its head against Harry's balls. Harry jumped slightly as he felt himself harden. He glared at the flushed snake, its blood shaded scales indicating that it was well on its way to being almost sex crazed already. "Ahh," he moaned, the sensation of rutting against something and having his balls probed and stroked…

"_Feels so good…" _He hissed to his snake.

"_Yessss… touch me… ssss…" _it hissed.

This brought Harry back to himself, if unfortunately aroused, and he grabbed the distracting serpent behind the head and looked it straight in the eye.

"_Alright, you blasted sex obsessed organ. Who did you have sex with?" _Harry began his questioning. It had other plans, and writhed pathetically in his hand, shrinking to about three inches in an attempt to escape, and flushing farther to a shade of pink nearly red. Harry grunted, the feel of his own hands was driving him nuts. How was he going to find out 'who done it' if he couldn't set hands on that blasted enchanted snake to prevent its escape while he confronted it? It then grew to nearly five feet, stretched out along his arm and tried to get in his mouth! The snake nipped at its owner's lips.

_So soft… hot… suck meee_… Harry jumped again as the head of his dick and specifically his slit, which had been altered into a mouth on the snake, was stimulated. Harry gave up… he was hard as all get out now. He gave a quick lick to the snake's head, gasping at the feel of his own tongue, and pumped the spit slicked snake 'til it shuddered and went limp. He came into his pants; his balls were attached to him after all not his snake.

This brought him right back to his questions. How did it get pregnant? It didn't have any sex organs… did it? He stood on still slightly weak legs, snake in hand, and walked across the empty dorm room to the showers. As he cleaned himself he returned to his questioning of the snake currently around his neck.

"_Who did you have sex with?" _he queried again, though more calmly than before.

"_Lotss, red head, her nessst matess, then taken to bird people and lotsss," _the snake responded sullenly.

"_Red head? You mean Ginny, right? The female red head?" _Harry grew angry as the snake nodded, "_That's not what I want to know… actually I do want to know those people too, but who penetrated you and got you egged?" _

The snake tried to distract Harry again, _"Red head fun… pretty red, ssoft…" _

And Harry thought about Ginny had gotten her hands on the snake.


	2. Chapter 2 How Ginny Took His Snake

Written 6-21-2011

Declaimer: This is fan fiction. That means I possibly own part of the plot, the snake, its eggs, and nothing else. That also means I do not own Harry and Co.

Warnings: A great deal of sexual stuff including but not necessarily limited to: masturbation, future bestiality with a snake, male Veela, slash of the male on male variety and heterosexual relations.

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Flashback- Late August

It had been a Saturday, and he had been running late for breakfast. He had shuffled into the shower to fortify himself, and take care of his teenage morning issue. He had been sufficiently muzzy headed after his dreams not to notice the changed shape and texture, but he had woken up quickly when it had started hissing about how good his hands felt. Instinctively he had jerked the possible threat away from his nether regions, and had stared in horror at his dick-less groin and the pit left in it from the snake's removal. He shoved his 'cock' back towards his crotch and was both relived that it reattached and dismayed that apparently he had been horribly, horribly pranked.

He had stumbled back to his bed, yanked the curtains closed, dropped his towel and examined the horror that had been inflicted upon him. The pinkish, gold eyed snake stared back up at him from its root just above his balls. It paled farther still, to what appeared to be a base white, as he lost the remainder of his morning wood. It made a confused sort of hiss, then giving up on him as a bad job appeared to go to sleep dangling between his legs. He sat abruptly, and wondered who'd he'd pissed off this week. He hoped this was not Voldemort's latest stunt. He winced at the thought of Riddle thinking about his nether regions.

"Harry!" Ginny jerked back his curtains, "You are going to miss breakfast entirely if you don't move it!" Harry had managed to jerk his blankets over just in time to avoid flashing her.

"Harry…" Ginny stared disapprovingly at him and his current state of nudity. "You've got to get dressed, we're going on a date after breakfast today, remember?" The sudden flux of hormones from his near flashing of Ginny caught the interest of the snake, and it peeked out from under the sheets at her.

"Harry, what is _that_!" she gasped out.

"It's a sex toy, Gin." He was mortified as his cock… snake thing eyed her up while avoiding his best efforts to hide it. He was very glad he'd come up with something so fast, even if that was mortifying in and of itself to say to his girlfriend.

"Really?" She seemed oddly interested in what kind of toy he'd been using. "What kind of things does it do? Does it respond to basic commands? Does it have self-cleaning charms?"

"Err…eh heh."

"Harry, as your girlfriend, if you refuse to tell me what it does, then you shall lend it to me so I can see for myself."

And that was that. After their date, he had rushed to the library to find spells suitable for a sex toy. When Ginny spoke in that tone, you did what she wanted. Even if it meant pulling off his disguised member, which strangely enough did not hurt, and letting her take it far out of sight and feel.

End Flashback


	3. Chapter 3 What Hermione Knows

Written 6-23-2011

Disclaimer: This is fan fiction. That means I possibly own part of the plot, the snake, its eggs, and nothing else. That also means I do not own Harry and Co.

Warnings: A great deal of sexual stuff including but not necessarily limited to: masturbation, future bestiality with a snake, male Veela, slash of the male on male variety and heterosexual relations.

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**Chapter 3: What Hermione Knows**

Harry strode pensively back into the empty dorm, towel around his waist and snake 'round his neck. Or, what had been an empty dorm. Hermione, book in hand, was staring at the eggs on his bedspread. Harry felt his plans of serious snake interrogation evaporate. It looked rather as though Harry Interrogation was on today's plans instead.

"Hermione," Harry greeted cautiously. She looked at him for a moment than turned back to his bed. "Did you want something 'Mione?" She looked back at him again.

"That snake strikes me as rather odd Harry." Harry paled. She continued, "The entire situation- you trying to become a business man, a sex toy inventing business? It just doesn't seem likely that connecting your name to sex would have occurred to you under normal conditions."

Harry spluttered, "It's not like that, Ginny just saw me messing around with it and… putting charms and stuff on it and I'd thought it would be an interesting thing to do after Voldie's dead and…"

"Harry," she interrupted, "You do not like talking about your life or your issues and I can hardly imagine you speaking about what you want in sex. I certainly cannot see you, in any way, shape, or form, putting something so personal out in public."

"And what do you mean by that!"

"Harry, selling sex toys that do what you like, that more or less tells the world what you like in bed." She stared at Harry, "There is no way that you would want to do that, you _must_ have something to hide to make you desperate enough to put your sexual preferences out there to act as a smokescreen for it." She paused, "Harry, I am your friend, through murderous Death Eaters, terrifying girlfriends, or homework that's due tomorrow, through thick and thin. If I can help you- Tell. Me. Now."

Harry stared at her, the late afternoon sun catching her frizzy hair and behind her setting the eggs off like precious stones. Eggs. His kids. This _was_ too big for him to muddle through alone now. He looked down.

"Yeah. It's bad 'Mione. I had thought I could handle it, the… well I can't and the issue's only gotten bigger."

"You can take a moment or a minute or an hour if you need it to find a way to tell me what's wrong, Harry. Just tell me what I can do now to help you." The utter sincerity was clear in her voice; he was glad she was there for him.

He nodded, grabbed some clothes, and hurried back to the bathroom to dress. What to say, what to say? Dressed, he returned and sat at the head of his bed, set the snake in the middle with the eggs and gestured for Hermione to take the foot. "You can start by helping me figure out which of my snake's eggs are by which people."

She stared at him then shook herself, "These are eggs, snake eggs, who's other genetic donors are humans who played with it?" Harry nodded miserably. "Well, do you have any ideas of what it finds attractive?"

"No, not really, or rather yes, it finds everything from Dumbledore to McGonagall to Snape to Malfoy to Pansy or in translation everyone but Filch, Crabbe and Goyle are more or less attractive and worthy of attention. And it refuses to say anything on the topic except 'mate' and 'pretty eyes'." Harry slumped back utterly frustrated. "Who done it, 'Mione?" He begged, swiftly rising to near shouting, "Who knocked up my snake? How the bloody hell'd they do it? I thought it was male!"

She looked sympathetic, which really bothered him, but she must have seen it as she spoke quickly, "Harry, one thing at a time. Let's work on the who first. Now take a deep breath. Magic is sometimes illogically logical." She abruptly broke off her lecture as Harry stared at her, eye twitching. "Yes, moving along, what I meant was the appearances of the eggs may have something to do with the parents."

"So, we've got a golden one," She paused and gave a snicker.

"What?" Harry asked softly, eyes narrowed angrily.

"Relax, Harry, I'm not laughing not about it or you," she waited until he sat back again. "I'm just remembering how the last golden egg shrieked at you." He reluctantly quirked a smile. She had a point, perhaps that was a little funny.

"Now, who do we know that has either skin, hair, or perhaps someone whose favorite color is this particular hue of pale gold?" She mused.

Harry interjected, "Or eyes."

"Yes, you'd said the snake mentioned that." She looked at him and fell into deep reflection. She'd been quiet for long enough that he jumped when she spoke up. "Malfoy."

"Huh? What's the Malferret have to do with anything, the blonde bas… oh."

She nodded, "Yes, oh, his hair is that color." Harry's eye twitched again. "Right, I'm pretty sure of that one, so moving along we've got two black, one green, and one red left."

"No."

"Harry?" She looked rather bemused at his sudden refusal of plain facts.

"I'm pretty sure, or the snake is anyway that it's got at least one more on the way." He did not look at her while he spoke, instead staring at the once again very, very smug snake. "_Blasted attention seeking idiot," he hissed. _

She gathered herself quickly, and ignored his communications with the white scaled animal. "Then we will work on what we've got right now. Two black, a red, and a green." She paused again, "Well, the black could be hair, or favorite color, or eyes." She sensed potential difficulties with the favorite color black and eye color black options and decided to move on. "But what do the red and green remind you of?"

He looked at the gem like depths of the red one. "Huh," he huffed in thought, "It reminds me most of the Philosopher's Stone."

"That's right, you actually saw, and held it didn't you?" Hermione was belatedly excited over the fact her best friend could tell her first hand about the most famous magical object ever, in both the Muggle and Wizarding worlds.

"'Mione," he whinged, "Focus." She stared at him with such laser intensity he felt cowed.

"Later. You will tell me, later." He nodded mutely, reflecting that Hermione had that tone too. Perhaps it was a part of a course offered to forceful girls… 'How to Become Women Who Get What They Want 101'?

"And what do you think of the green?"

"Adava Kedavre."

She stared incredulously at him, "This un-hatched piece of life reminds you of the Killing Curse?"

"Yes, yes it does. I've seen it Hermione, and this looks so much like it I can hardly tolerate looking at it." He crossed his arms, and pulled in his shoulders.

"Well, you have, but I think it looks like your eyes that one time you really blew up at Ron and I."

"My eyes do not look like that."

"That summer, when we first went to Headquarters, when you lost it with us, your eyes glowed that shade of green."

Harry scrubbed his face again, "Really?" He asked in a weak tone.

"Yes," she said softly.

"Oh."

"So, that one could be yours then." Harry could tell she was reaching for a more upbeat tone.

"No."

"No?" The continued dismissal of reality had her bemused again.

"I've never, um… done with my… thing to the snake." He stumbled over his words, deeply embarrassed to be talking to her about this.

"Oh."

"Mmhm."

"Harry, you should take a break, you are altogether too stressed. Let's put these somewhere safe and go do something else for a while."

He looked at her askance, "I can't just leave them somewhere. What if they get hurt?"

"And when I came in they were all alone, just fine. No stop right there, I'm not going to argue with you right now. You don't need more stress. And with that she grabbed a sock and transfigured it into a heavy collar type necklace torque on which she gently fastened the eggs like oversized gemstones. She cast again, muttering softly as she flicked her wand over it.

"Unbreakable charms and a couple charms for the eggs' health, you know- the right temperature, humidity and so on. Now you can take them with and they'll be safe as you. Which really isn't much, yes I know trouble finds you, just try to be careful."

"'Mione, you are the best friend ever," he gathered her into a hug, then broke away to grab his broom. "I'll see you on the pitch?"

"Sure, I can read out there too."


	4. Chapter 4 Problems in Potions

Written July 14 and 15, 2011.

Disclaimer: This is fan fiction. That means I possibly own the plot, the snake, its eggs, and nothing else. That also means I do not own Harry and Co.

Warnings: A great deal of sexual stuff including but not necessarily limited to: masturbation, future bestiality with a snake, male Veela, slash of the male on male variety and heterosexual relations.

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**Chapter 4: Problems in Potions**

For once Harry's troubles did not leave him while he was flying. He pulled up abruptly and just sat on his broom, back to the late afternoon sun. His eyes drifted to where Hermione sat. He knew what she had been thinking when she moved on from the black. Black hair perhaps could be anyone of nearly a quarter of the school. As for favorite color, who knew? But black eyes, well, only one person he knew had black eyes.

Snape. Bane of Gryffindors. Harasser of Hufflepuffs. Ridiculer of Ravenclaws. The greasy git, the dungeon bat, the childhood rival of his father, the bastard who went out of his way to make Harry's life miserable.

Snape, who had confiscated his snake, and done who knows what to it for three days. Harry conceded to himself that he now had a much better idea of what that unmitigated bastard had been doing.

Flashback- Late August

He had gone down to breakfast with Ron and Hermione, only to be pulled aside by Ginny. She handed his snake back to him, the pale scales luminous in the dim hallway. She pulled him close, kissed him, then pushed him back. He looked bemusedly at her.

"Harry, that toy is a rip-off; it hardly does anything at all. It doesn't even vibrate on command." Harry felt rather disturbed by her casual tone. She said very seriously, "I hope that you can get a refund."

Harry choked.

"What's wrong, Harry?" She stared at him, concern clear in her chocolate brown eyes. "Are you not feeling well?"

Harry could hardly tell her what was wrong, so he came up with another 'brilliant' lie. "No, Gin, I'm fine. It's, well, you see…"

"Spit it out Har," she grinned at him. Harry felt weak in the knees. Her hair seemed to glow slightly with its own light, her eyes sparkled brightly, and that dimple. He kissed her again. She pushed him back.

"Harry…" Her tone was somewhat ominous. Harry grinned unrepentantly at her

"Well, Gin, I've been messing around with some ideas…" Harry hesitated, and then continued, "Sort of about what I'm going to do after school, and what if I invented stuff? I mean, as famous as I am (much as you know I dislike it), unless the stuff I'm selling is awful, people will buy it, right? So, what if I invented a …um, adult toy?"

She interrupted him, "This is your 'invention'?" Harry nodded sheepishly. Ginny threw her head back and let out a bright bell-like peal of laughter. "Harry, if that's what you want to do, then I'm supporting you all the way. But it really needs work. See if you can find a vibrating spell, and I'll think about what else you could add." And with that she turned away and headed towards the Great Hall for breakfast.

Harry sighed. More spells to put on his already enchanted member. It blinked at him, more evidence that it was not a real snake, it had eyelids. At least she didn't think that there was anything else going on. Harry pushed himself off the wall, and followed. No reason to go to Potions class on an empty stomach after all.

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"Potter, ten points from Gryffindor for tardiness." Harry glared hatefully at the Potions Professor. Malfoy strutted through the doorway after Harry, but the greasy git had turned away. Harry stormed over to Ron's and his lab station and sat with a quiet but no less angry huff. Ron gave him a sympathetic look but did not dare say anything; the Bat's keen ears were always pricked for students speaking out of turn.

Harry got to work, chopping, dicing, cubing, shredding… The class was almost over and he was racing against time, just a few more steps… It's got to turn green, stir three times counterclockwise, then a figure eight clockwise. He stared incredulous at his finished potion. He looked to Hermione's, then back. It was exactly the same silvery blue. He almost felt like cheering aloud, until Snape called for the class's attention.

Harry was horrified. There, in his Potion Professor's slimy hands was a white snake with gold eyes. It seemed pleased to be the entire class's focus and flushed slightly pink as it curled around Snape's narrow fingers. Harry could feel his arousal, even as he was thankful he could not also feel the hands holding it up for the class to inspect.

"Which of you idiotic dunderheads brought your pet to class?" Snape hissed as he stalked through the students. Harry reluctantly raised his hand. While he would very much like to have it back now, if not yesterday; it was clear the Bat was on the warpath.

"Potter, I might have guessed." Snape loomed over him, and Harry felt the height difference keenly as he shrunk away. "For reckless endangerment of an animal, fifteen points off Gryffindor; for reckless endangerment of your classmates, thirty-five points off; for disobeying school rules on which animals may be kept as pets, twenty; and another five for thinking you could get away with it." Here, the bastard raised one fine, black eyebrow in anticipation of backtalk. Harry stared sullenly up at him. "I shall also keep the animal until you have a note signed by your head of house giving you permission to have it." Harry paled as Snape's thumb rubbed across the snake's head. Harry was disgusted when he realized that given the man's short distance from himself he could feel that thumb and those hands and it felt very good. He almost said something that surely would have resulted in more point loss when Hermione boldly interjected.

"Sir, surely," she had hardly begun when Snape cut her off.

"I do not wish to hear it, Ms. Granger. Potter, furthermore you shall have an hour of detention with me each day until I have that note in my hands. It will start at 7:45 tonight. Do not be late." He sneered around at the class, all of whom tried to pretend that they had not all been watching the drama unfold. "Bottle and cap what pitiful excuses you have for today's potion and turn it in now." Snape strode to the front of the class, snake in a robe pocket.

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It had taken Harry three days to get his appointment with Professor McGonagall, and while she saw nothing wrong with him having two pets, provided he could manage them (he assured her he could) he still had undergone three back breaking cauldron cleaning sessions courtesy of Snape. More disturbingly still, he had been frequently hard, as though someone was stroking him and had ejaculated a number of times, though not noticed by others, in public.

Damn Snape.

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_Alright people, you must have something to say? Right? _

_Review._


	5. Chapter 5 Who? When!

_Written 6-23-2011_

_Disclaimer:__ This is fan fiction. That means I possibly own part of the plot, the snake, its eggs, and nothing else. That also means I do not own Harry and Co. _

_Warnings:__ A great deal of sexual stuff including but not necessarily limited to: masturbation, future bestiality with a snake, male Veela, slash of the male on male variety and heterosexual relations._

_Present- a relatively warm day in January._

**Chapter 5: Who! When?**

His mood thoroughly ruined by thoughts of Snape, he dove towards Hermione. He landed heavily and plopped down next to her in the stands.

Hermione moved her bookmark then closed her hefty tome. She examined Harry for a moment. There really was something very wrong if even flying couldn't relieve his stress. Well, sooner I get to the bottom of this the sooner I can help him figure it out.

"You know, maybe it would be possible to figure it out by when your snake had… sex, who it was with." Hermione stated. Harry nodded jerkily.

"After Snape," Harry was interrupted by Hermione. "Professor Snape, Harry."

Harry glared at the pitch and said stiffly, "Hermione, given the fact that two of the eggs are black and could be his, I will call that snake molesting man whatever I want." Hermione looked away for a moment and mentally conceded the point to Harry, "So long as you call him Professor to his face."

Harry scowled as he continued, "Anyway, after he gave it back, I had it till mid-September before Ginny took it from me again. She only kept it for a couple days though."

When Ginny returned the snake to him Harry was dismayed. Though he had to admit he had not had it long before Ginny had taken it the first time, it had been mostly quiet and subdued, acting only somewhat out of the norm for what it should be. Now it spoke incessantly and verbally admired everyone that Harry walked past, not just girls but _everyone_, _in detail_. He had been constantly half hard the entire time as his enchanted member could now lust after its potential mates itself without mental input from himself.

And then, after Ginny had taken it for the second time, he had been coming at the strangest times. He knew that fifth year classes were on a different schedule than sixth year, but there was no way all of what she was doing was out of class. Even though Professor McGonagall had been completely unaware at the time, creaming his pants when she walked by had been one of the most mortifying things in his entire life.

He yanked himself from his thoughts, "After she gave it back I had the snake until early October, because I had quite the list of spells she wanted me to put on it. You know, I didn't put half the spells on it that were on that blasted list; only what would be really obvious if they weren't there, and it still was believable that casting those spells on it took that long."

Hermione gently nodded in sympathy at his clear reluctance to enchant his pet. Ginny must be rather unobservant if she thought it was really just an animated object. There was only so far a sixth year's inanimate object animating abilities could stretch after all. Perhaps she was rather gullible- she had been fooled by the diary, in her first year. Still, she had only been eleven then, at fifteen, she had much less of an excuse. Harry speaking again broke into her musings.

"Then after October it just vanished."

Hermione blinked. "Vanished?"

"I didn't hear anything about it for a week. So I went looking for it and found out it was being passed around the school. (I could sure feel that. Many more uncomfortable weeks for me.) I was always a step or two behind; everyone had already passed it on until I found Professor McGonagall with it wrapped around her robes like a sash near early November." Harry took a breath, "Ginny took it less than three days later, and it was passed around the school again- that time even the Slytherins had even gotten it, and that was the last I heard until it came slithering back mid-January. I did understand from the snake that it actually left Hogwart's grounds with Malfoy." Harry glowered and scared a group of second years on the pitch.

"Damn Malfoy's up to something and was messing with my snake!" Harry ran his hands through his hair in an attempt to smooth the spiked strands.

"Harry, even though something is up, we should focus on what we can deal with."

Hermione tried to keep Harry from one of his Slytherin induced contemplations. (Other Gryffindors generally called these long think sessions something along the lines of brooding.)

"Hermione, he took it home- for all we know the Death Eaters could have gotten their dirty mitts on it. Or even Voldemort… He's even got that great big snake." Harry made a face but in reality even he couldn't take his last few comments too seriously. Malfoy would surely have bragged about making off with Potter's snake and some serious curses would have been put on it by more mature Death Eaters in hopes of getting him.

At that moment the snake popped up from one of Harry's robe pockets.

"_Ssshe sssnake wasss very pretty, looked like green leavesss with bright yellow eyesss_."

Harry paled, Merlin no, he mentally pled. "_Please tell me you didn't have sex with her."_

The snake looked very, very smug. _"I left a sssurprissse in ssshe sssnake, ssseveral. Ssshe was very nice."_

Hermione was quite concerned when Harry abruptly turned green after talking with his snake. "Harry?"

He looked, very green in the face, "He impregnated Nagini."

Hermione felt she understood what he was getting at, "You were lucky he didn't put a time delayed curse on your snake to get you with."

Harry, still a pale green, was also confused, "He."

"Yes, he- you know who, Voldemort, the one who owns Nagini?"

Harry's eye twitched.

The snake spoke up then, _"He wasss very nice too."_

Harry promptly lost his lunch.

Damn Voldemort.


	6. Ch 6 A Close Encounter: The Dark Lord

Started 9/17/11

Finished and posted 9/21/11.

_Disclaimer:__ This is fan fiction. That means I possibly own part of the plot, the snake, its eggs, and the character interactions, and not a whole lot else. I am not making any money from this. That also means I do not own Harry and Co. _

_Warnings: _**Bestiality with a snake (here it is, people, you have been warned!), **_possible Veela, slash of the male on male variety, and a great deal of sexual stuff._

_Parseltongue is italicized. _

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**A Close Encounter with the Dark Lord**

The white marble floor was cold under his bare feet. In the dim lamp light the reflection below him was insubstantial, his pale feet most visible before blurrily a dark robe was visible, around the top of which a glimmer of a darkly green substance framed a pale oval. All around him the dark halls stretched loftily, all pale woods and more fine stonework. The Malfoys were certainly well to do, and it pleased him to disturb the purebloods' Yule. If he decided to inflict upon them with his presence for two weeks, they would not dare say anything to the contrary. Being a Dark Lord was a fine thing, he mused, when one had such wealthy followers. But his train of thought was derailed with a great smash (all mentally, of course, but when Dark Lords' trains of thought were derailed they made mental scenes worthy of Dark Lords, full of flames and people screaming) when he heard a disgruntled hissing. Nagini looked up sharply (she had been admiring their reflection in the floor as well), _"Who is that, Master!" _

"_Nagini, I do not know."  
><em>"_Can we go find out?"  
><em>"_I certainly intend to do so, you may stay with me or not as you like."  
><em>Nagini picked up that he was teasing her, and she wrinkled what few facial muscles she possessed into a pout, or as close as a snake, even a magical snake, could.

They discovered the object of their curiosity trying to get into the Malfoys' master bedroom. It turned as they approached and stared at them with blinking gold eyes.

"_Master_," said Nagini with horror, _"He has eyelids!"  
><em>"_Perhaps he is a mutation or wizard creation rather than a naturally born snake."  
><em>The scarlet snake before them looked hurt. "_I might be a little strange, but there is no reason to be mean_."

Voldemort was mildly surprised by the well developed speech of the serpent. Most snakes he had come across were capable of only limited conversation, and most were concerned only with food and things of similar nature. Even Nagini spoke like at times like a child. He took a moment to recollect his thoughts.  
>"<em>Serpent, who are you and why are you here?"<em>

The snake momentarily looked like a kicked puppy. _"My master has not given me a name, he calls me snake. And those I was mating with kicked me out of bed before I had achieved satisfaction. Then when I tried to re-join them they threw me out of the room."_

Voldemort felt rather shocked, though his expressions were schooled enough not to give him away. _"I would not have thought that the Malfoys enjoyed sex with serpents_," He hissed softly to Nagini.  
>"<em>Me either. But I would like some with you now," <em>she responded hopefully.  
>Voldemort's thin lips pressed together in a pleased smile. <em>"Serpent, would you care to join my lovely and I for our mating?"<em>

It rose to a strike position in astonishment. "_May I?" _

"_Yes and what is your gender?"  
><em>"_I am male… mostly, but I can carry eggs as well_." The scarlet snake spoke most proudly.  
>"<em>You know for sure?" <em>Voldemort was convinced that this was most likely a magically created creature now, surely no one snake would be so mutated naturally.  
>"<em>Yes, I carry now three eggs." <em>Voldemort could not ever recall meeting a snake more pleased to be carrying young. It was also strange for an egg-bound snake wish to have sex; most serpents had no interest in mating once fertilization had already occurred. _"Could not mating damage your young?"_

"_No, please may we mate now?"  
><em>"_If you are quite certain, then we shall retire to my rooms and we may then mate." _

Voldemort led the way to his rooms. Nagini spoke to him, _"Thank you, Master, I have wanted to be mated by another snake for so long."  
><em>"_It shall be pleasing to watch you be mated as well, and then I shall fill you both."  
><em>She hissed in pleasure at the thought_, "Yessss Master, I love it when you enter me."_

**Bestiality with a snake (Here it is people, you have been warned!).**

The snake slithering behind them was listening closely and desired very much to have another within his body; he needed to climax so badly. And he would have sex with a female properly for the first time as well. He had turned a deep blood red in desire, and even in the flickering fire-light stood out from the frosty marble. Voldemort admired the striking appearance for a moment longer before allowing the snake into his warm chambers, decorated all in deep burgundy, dark browns and ash grays. The snake waited for the pale human to lead the way to the bedroom, but Nagini had other ideas.  
>She flowed down her master's body and lunged for the other snake.<br>To her shock, he expanded to a great size before she could mount him, take him within her, and trapped her twenty five foot length within far vaster coils.  
>"Take me," She demanded lustily.<br>"Soon," he hissed and began scenting her up and down her mottled green scales. She trembled with desire as his tongue flickered over her scales, and she tangled her own with it when he returned to her mouth. He pulled away, and licked his way towards her tail… and her opening. It quivered open at his gentle ministrations, and he stuck his long forked tongue into her cloaca.

Voldemort watched attentively as he disrobed, revealing snow-coloured flesh stretched over a slender, tall frame. He was very aroused by Nagini's eager, writhing body. The male snake's dangling and surprisingly human-like hemipenises also intrigued him.

He took a moment to mentally curse Pettigrew for his incompetence, the slickness between his legs- physical evidence of his body's interest in a male was just farther proof that his resurrection ritual had been very flawed.

When the male serpent looped a coil around him, Voldemort was distracted from all other thoughts. He was drawn close to Nagini, lying on the same massive coils, and the male serpent moved Nagini onto of Voldemort while the serpent was still thrusting into her. Nagini looped around Voldemort and held him tightly as the other male drove her to climax with a great hiss of satisfaction. Voldemort held her in his arms, feeling the strength of the thrusts as the serpent continued towards its own climax. When it came and withdrew from Nagini's slack body, Voldemort was ready. He grabbed its tail and as the spent hemipenes were still withdrawing into its cloaca he jammed the opening down around his long-neglected penis. The pinkish serpent shuddered as Voldemort entered, thrusting his member within the male serpent as Nagini watched in post-coital pleasure.

"Yesssss," Voldemort hissed as the coils rubbed against his sides and beneath him, as the serpent's tight entrance slipped and tightened around his plunging cock. With the incredible stimuli and the long wait Voldemort came quickly, and the serpent shuddered his second release within moments of Voldemort's.

They lay in the living room of Voldemort's suite for several minutes before Voldemort stirred, to both snakes' dismay. He hissed his denial to their plan to just stay before the grand fireplace all night as he strode to the bedroom. He paused only long enough to cast a wandless cleaning spell and pull back the covers before he collapsed onto the black silk sheets; as he shifted around the snakes slithered into bed with him, grumbling. The three of them fell asleep quickly, Nagini to his left and the gold eyed serpent to his right.

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Voldemort woke to a snake's cool tongue flickering over his member. Looking down, he found the gold-eyed snake nudging his member to full arousal. The smooth scales against his inner thighs and genitals woke his libido very quickly. The snake was much smaller this morning as compared to last night and when it swallowed his member (with much gusto) it was delightfully tight. He stroked the snake's head gently, and he felt it jump. It must not have realized he had woken up, he thought amused. He tightened his grip as he moved his hand down its body; he enjoyed the feel of the layers of the snake's body between his hand and his cock. It wiggled slightly as he started masturbating through the snake, and stared up at him with pleasure in its eyes. He was a little surprised that the snake enjoyed this, Nagini hadn't, when she was this size, at perhaps four feet long. Now that Nagini was larger, he couldn't do this anyway (his hand could not reach around her any longer), but… His thought trailed off as the snake began biting him gently. He came shortly after the snake began introducing its tiny teeth to the sensitive skin at the base of his cock, and the snake pulled off.  
>"<em>You taste nice."<br>_Voldemort blinked. "_Thanks," _he said dryly, raising an eyebrow.  
>"<em>But you smell funny."<br>_Voldemort raised the other eyebrow.  
>"<em>You smell of both male and female."<br>_Voldemort flushed bright red and began mentally cursing Wormtail again.  
>"<em>Are you both male and female?"<br>_The Dark Lord swallowed dryly, _"Yesss, the condition is called hermaphrodism."  
><em>The snake paused for a moment that disturbed Voldemort. Would the snake laugh at him?  
>"<em>May we mate again now? <em>It hesitated for a moment_, "Would you let me enter you_?"  
>Voldemort thought for a time, making the snake wave anxiously in front of his face. Did he want to have sex with those parts? He had asked Nagini to touch him there, out of curiosity, though she had always refused. Such a straight snake when it came to whom she would have sex with (she would not look at another female sexually, or touch those parts of himself more than casually) even though she enjoyed watching him enter whomever took his fancy. Not that he could have sex with anyone save Nagini now that Wormtail's incompetence had turned him into a hermaphrodite. He did want to have sex with his female parts, and, he decided, this snake was handsome enough to lose his, and he paused disgustedly at the thought, virginity to. Given his willingness to use sex as a tool during his youth, he'd never thought he'd need to think of that again.<p>

He looked at the nervous serpent and gently took it by the head. Its eyes were wide with fear so he stroked his thumb across its head. "I am not angry with you," He paused as he brought the snake to his spread legs, and he used his other hand to lift his half-hard cock and balls to the side to reveal the hole, slick and open with eagerness. "Start with licking first," he commanded, "Then you may enter me."  
>The snake stared at his face in disbelief a moment, and, when he brought its head closer to his opening, with lust at his vulva.<p>

The moment he let it go, it coiled the upper part of his body between his legs and, waving back and forth, it feinted lunging at his crotch. But when it finally touched him, it moved very slowly towards his vulva from above, rubbing its head against his scrotum before gently flicking its tongue against the female flesh. It rubbed its head slowly around the entirety of his opening before licking the inner flesh. As Voldemort watched, the serpent's head slipped into his vulva, still licking, the scales sliding smoothly into his virgin channel. He purposely tightened his pelvic muscles, squeezing the snake somewhat. But instead of withdrawing, as he had expected the snake to, it slid in farther, and muffled hisses of pleasure emitted. It then brought one of its coils into play, stroking the underside of his vulva and his perineum. Voldemort fought the urge to through his head back at the sensations, the snake stroking, licking its way deeper into him, withdrawing slightly then continuing in. He found himself absentmindedly fondling his penis as he watched the thick, scarlet-bodied snake penetrate his vulva, felt it sliding up his vagina. He moaned softly, and when the snake sent another coil to join his hand on his dick, he woke Nagini with the volume his pleasured vocalizations. Soon the snake reached a depth that pleased it and began pulling out part way before plunging itself back in. Voldemort allowed his body to thrust into the movements. There was no way to pretend that he was not enjoying being penetration at this point, and who would the snakes tell anyway? Potter? He snorted to the thought and it seemed as thought the snake heard him and took it as a challenge. It completely changed the pace of its thrusts. Voldemort's entire being was consumed by the new rhythm; there was not a single part of his mind that could focus on anything but his own pleasure. The scarlet length trusting into him, the coils around him, pumping his manhood, the way Nagini started rubbing herself against his stomach and nipples. He came with a great shout, his penis spraying ejaculate across the joined bodies, his vagina clenching tightly around the creature within him.

As he collapsed into sated mush the snake withdrew from his body, its scarlet scales glistening with natural lubricants from Voldemort's still spasming channel. It arched over him for a moment, desirous gold eyes surveying his panting form and it expanded from its slender four foot length to a size similar in thickness to a man's thigh and perhaps twelve feet long. Voldemort stared down the length of his own body at the hemipenis the snake was positioning at his vulva, which alone was thicker than the entire snake had been before! He stopped himself from protesting, he had said that the snake could enter him this way, and he had known that the snake could alter its size at will. He would not go back on his word. He was a political figure after all, not merely some lowly terrorist. He inhaled sharply as the snake thrust its penis up his channel. That hurt! Oh that hurt, that hurt, that hurt…

The pain eased soon enough and he began rocking up into the serpent's powerful thrusts. Nagini was nosing along his body again, and shoved the male snake off Voldemort's abdomen, disruption their mating, though not actually dislodging the serpent's member.

"Nagini?" He queried in dismay, that had been feeling good.  
>"Want you master," she hissed breathily as she slammed her cloaca down around his erect member. He moaned as she wrapped herself firmly around him and he stroked her sides with his hands as he thrust into her. The male serpent wound himself firmly around them both and resumed plunging into Voldemort. Voldemort noticed vaguely that something was stroking his anus which concerned him for a moment before being wiped cleanly from his mind by a particularly sharp thrust from the other male. When something slender actually penetrated to his rectum, he gave a wordless cry of shock and protest. An alternating thrust started between the appendage in his vagina and the one in his rectum, one that was driving him steadily to the brink.<p>

The scarlet snake came first with a roar, shooting its seed deep into the Dark Lord before collapsing limply over them both. Nagini came next- driven over the edge by the lust filled sound and her master's thrusting penis. Her tightened channel brought Voldemort to climax as he stabbed upwards into the green serpent riding his member and spilled his seed within his much beloved familiar.

Voldemort lay panting underneath the two serpents and it took him several minutes to get enough energy to push them off. It then took several minutes to convince the male serpent, who was now white he noted absently, to extract its member from within the himself. It took another half an hour before he could motivate himself to get up for the day. He stood up gingerly and winced with every step on the way to the shower. Losing his female virginity was much more painful afterwards than having sex on the receiving end as a male. Perhaps it was because he had been stretched better by his human fuck buddy, and the other boy's cock had been much thinner than the snake's. He considered this as he bathed and dressed. After casting a pain relieving spell he put it out of his mind.

It was time to go frighten the Malfoys. He cackled mentally, it was fun to watch them twitch when he spoke to them. If he watched his timing, maybe he could make Lucius choke on his breakfast. He laughed at loud at the thought, the prim and proper man spitting his food across the table, and his wife and son's faces!

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Some vocabulary for those not familiar with these anatomical nouns.  
><span>Cloaca<span>- a common cavity at the end of the digestive tract for the release of both excretory and genital products in vertebrates (except for most mammals).  
><span>Hemipenis- <span>the name for the paired reproductive organs in snakes and lizards. (This is not the gonads/ testes; this is their version of a penis.)  
><span>Scrotum<span>- a pouch of skin containing the testicles.  
><span>Vagina<span>- the muscular tube leading from the vulva to the cervix (the narrow neck-like passage forming the lower end of the womb) in women and most female mammals.  
><span>Vulva-<span>the external female genitals, the external opening of the vagina or reproductive track in a female mammal or nematode.


	7. Chapter 7: In Which Harry Thinks

_Disclaimer:__ This is fan fiction. That means I possibly own part of the plot, the snake, its eggs, and the character interactions, and not a whole lot else. I am not making any money from this. That also means I do not own Harry and Co. _

_Warnings:__ A great deal of sexual stuff including but not necessarily limited to: masturbation, future bestiality with a snake, male Veela, slash of the male on male variety and heterosexual relations._

_Parseltongue is italicized. _

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**Chapter 7: In Which Harry Thinks**

It was early February, and according to some of the spells Hermione had found, the eggs from the snake's first clutch would soon be hatching. Harry was not really sure how he felt about anything lately, he was anxious and angry and almost happy that he was going to have kids and that threw him for a loop and everything else! He had tried to break it down, and it didn't go that well, the emotions came from everything together, so… huh.

Voldemort sending him that disturbing dream. Good God, Harry had never wanted to know about Voldemort's sexual exploits, and now Voldemort had engaged in sex with Harry's disguised member. How disturbing could life get? Harry knew how he felt about that, ick much? And one of the snake's- Harry's little snake babies was Voldemort's… heir? He felt, well, disgusted was good, but, well… how can you feel about your arch-enemy having pleasurable sex with your… huh. And why would Voldemort want Harry to think about his sex life? Harry went green. Don't go there, come on Potter, think about something else… Ginny!

And what about how he felt about Ginny? He loved her, he was almost certain, but how could he trust her if she would lend one of his processions around the entire school without even telling him about it first, or better yet asking. If she would be so thoughtless things she believed to be minor, how could he trust her with the bigger things, like his future children, should they marry? Or even just with sex? Would she go around and discuss in detail with all her little friends the first time that they had sex? How could he even contemplate deepening their relationship to that level? Harry came to a conclusion then. If he couldn't trust a woman with his children, he wouldn't even date them. He thought about this. Should I break up with Ginny? He couldn't continue that thought. Time for the next thought. Something else, something else, come on, something else…

The snake's second clutch! Yes, that was safe to think about! No, no, it wasn't actually, but it was better at least. Harry sighed. He was glad he was safely in bed with his curtains drawn… He really didn't want to talk to people so soon after having a wet dream about sex with snakes from Voldemort's point of view. Urgh. He shuddered, come on, back to the second clutch.

He wrested his mind back to the paired bracelets he was now sporting, which possessed large silver links and one black and one silver oval-shaped 'rock'. The snake had laid only the two eggs this time, for which Harry was supremely grateful. They had come at about four-ish in the morning on January twenty-fifth and Harry had been disgusted to find that there was another black egg. Merlin, how could his cock, while free willed and completely independent of his own ideas find Snape attractive at all let alone that attractive? Do I really want to know that? Hmm… Yes, I have to know. What could be appealing about Snape? Harry was nearly crying of frustration from keeping the animal contained, far from Snape and any other males. It really wanted to have another round with someone and especially Snape, so Harry had to find out why. I'll have to ask a girl what could be appealing about other guys. I hope Hermione will be willing to field that question. I don't think I could ask anyone else… who else could I ask? Luna? Tonks?He hummed dismissively. I sure hope Hermione has an answer. Back to the eggs, come on Potter, you really do not want to think about Snape that way. Harry's desire for reclusion increased when he realized he was pep talking himself.

The other egg was a brushed silver color and the smallest yet, only about the size of a quail's egg (1). Harry had no idea who could have sired this egg since the only silver-eyed people (and those were more of a blue that seemed silver in certain lights) he knew where those damned Malfoys and the Mal-ferret's egg was gold. Hermione had planned that today they should try and interrogate the snake again. Harry still hadn't told her what really was going on, but she had accepted that he didn't want to hold the snake during interrogation. She clearly wanted to know why, but she had been very kind about it when he had told her that he didn't want to explain. How do you explain to your best female friend (or anyone, actually) that when he was trying to interrogate his 'pet' he could feel the hands on it if was within five feet of himself and that it aroused him? More so the entire truth- that the snake was his cock? But Harry had a plan for questioning the snake. He might not be up to telling the truth but he would get answers from the thing. Plan A consisted of Hermione holding it at a distance while he translated her questions and then the snake's response. She had even found a variation of a truth serum used for sphinxes, naga, centaurs and the like that would be safe for his snake's consumption. (Although Harry doubted the test subjects for that potion had been willing, history was very clear on how wizards in general thought about other intelligent beings…) They would finally be getting answers! That thought alone motivated him to leave his bed. The snake hissed wordlessly at him in annoyance.

"_Shut it, you_," he spat. The thing was going to get what was coming to it for being such a pain. He blinked. That thought could be taken wrong in so many ways… Whatever, he refused to think about it and began dressing for the day. Shirt, trousers, socks, robes, and the egg neck ornament and bracelets. He was now wearing more jewelry than Hermione usually did. It was strange for him to be more decorated than a girl, it really was. It looked off, in Harry's personal opinion. He couldn't really pull it off. After all, he was not some stuck-up, rich pureblood snob that thought it was fashionable to wear lace and necklaces and what-not.

He tried waking Ron, but when his best friend tried to punch him while still asleep even Harry knew it was time to concede defeat. Sluggishly he slouched downstairs to the common room.

"Hermione?"

"Good morning, Harry," she smiled brightly at him.

"Hermione, it should be illegal to be that peppy this early."

She waved a hand dismissively, "All times before breakfast are too early for you and Ron." Harry scowled. "Let's go down for breakfast then, shall we?" Still smiling, she gathering today's books. Harry tried to pull himself together. He had to stop taking out his bad mood on Hermione. He nodded sharply trying to focus on good thoughts; today was a good day, remember that Potter. He scowled harder, another pep talk? Don't they say that the first sign of insanity is talking to yourself? He asked Hermione about it as they walked towards the Great Hall.

"Don't worry Harry, you have every reason to be a little off, and you'd be as sane as anyone else if you had some stress-free time. It's perfectly normal to act oddly under extreme stress. Merlin knows that I talk to myself around test dates." She reassured him brightly.

"Why are you so cheerful?" he grumbled.

"Today is a marvelous day, Harry; we are finally getting some answers!" She positively crowed. With her help, Harry found a rare good mood which lasted until they had almost finished eating. Then his life took the disturbed factor to an entirely new level.

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_I do appreciate reviews..._

(1) I am basing the size comparisons to birds' eggs according to this picture: .


	8. Voldemort Takes the Cake! err, Snake!

_Begun Oct 23, 2011  
>Finished Jan 27, 2012<em>

_Disclaimer:__This is fan fiction. That means I possibly own part of the plot, the snake, its eggs, and the character interactions, and not a whole lot else. I am not making any money from this. That also means I do not own Harry and Co. _

_Warnings:__ A great deal of sexual stuff including but not necessarily limited to: masturbation, future bestiality with a snake, male Veela, slash of the male on male variety and heterosexual relations._

_Parseltongue is italicized. _

What should Voldemort name Harry's snake? Please review and tell me what you think.

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**Chapter 8: The Invasion of Hogwarts**

Harry had a brain wave. "Hermione, are there spells to curb lust in animals during breeding season?" She looked at him with a most peculiar expression. Harry pulled the sleepy snake from his pocket. "Just because we put that anti-pregnancy spell on him doesn't make him want to mate any less. I'm having difficulties lately keeping him away from people."

Her face cleared in understanding. "Oh, I'm almost sure there must be, but I don't know any offhand. We'll go to the library later and look that up." Harry smiled and nodded.

"That sounds good. Say, Hermione, why did the professors give us the day off?"

Hermione laughed, "Nice Harry."

Harry blinked, "I'm completely serious."

"What will Ginny say when she finds out you didn't make any plans for Valentine's Day?" she gasped in mock terror.

"V-Valentine's Day is today?" Harry was terrified, "I completely forgot! Ginny will kill me; I don't have a gift for her or anything!"

"Just take her out for a nice lunch in Hogsmead, then shop a little and don't tell her you forgot. It'll be fine, Harry," Hermione patted his shoulder.

"You think so?" Harry asked with his head flat on the table in misery.

"It'll be fine; look here she comes now, when she comes over just ask her to go on a date with you for an early lunch at the Three Broomsticks later." Hermione instructed.

"Why an early lunch?" Harry hissed out of the corner of his mouth.

"If you didn't make a reservation it'll be hard to get a table at lunchtime today and I need you back in the evening so we can question your pet," she hissed back.

Harry pasted a bright smile on his face and turned, "Morning, Ginny."

"Harry, Happy Valentine's Day!" Ginny was stunning. Her flowing, crimson hair had been elaborately styled on the top of her head and cascaded elegantly past her slender neck to a pale gold dress. The dress itself was made in delicate layers of a filmy material that reminded one of butterfly's wings and frilled in ivory lace. Standing in the sunlight, dust motes haloing her, she appeared nothing less than a goddess. Harry was stunned. His heart had jumped into his throat and he wondered how she had fallen for him. He also wondered if she would give him time to change into his dress robes. He felt rather shabby beside her. Ginny chatted with Hermione and Harry noticed that Hermione was also dressed up. He cleared his throat.

"Ginny, would you care to go to Hogsmead with me today for an early lunch at the Three Broomsticks?" Harry felt rather awkward after asking and wondered when the best time would be for him to compliment her on her appearance. She beamed and Harry nearly melted before he could hear her reply.

"I'd love to Harry," she spoke softly, just to him. He sighed in relief.

"Thank you, Ginny. You look especially amazing today…" He trailed off, gazing at her reverently. She blushed and looked away. He watched her radiant face and jumped when she took his hand and squeezed it. Their moment was rudely interrupted by a grunt from Ron. He flopped gracelessly on to the bench, looking rumpled and still half asleep. He reached vaguely for the sausage and dragged his sleeve through Harry's plate.

"Ginny, would you mind if I took a few minutes to get ready before we go?" Harry asked, frowning at his breakfast. It now had Ron's elbow in it.

"Not at all, Harry. Shall we meet down by the lake and then walk together to the carriages?"

"Sounds good, Ginny. I'll see you in a few." He left quickly; for once he was truly disgusted with Ron. The robes that he'd dragged through Harry's plate were the same ones that he'd worn yesterday in Herbology- Harry could still smell the dragon's dung fertilizer. Harry's stomach was still upset after last night's odd vision-nightmare thing and Ron had nearly sent him over the edge again. H swallowed harshly and hurried up to the Tower. Once back into the dorms he changed into a nicer pair of robes with a dress shirt and slack beneath. He secured the snake in his pocket with some handy trap spells and took a moment to compose himself. Today is going to be a great day, Harry. You are going to have a beautiful, sunny day to spend with the sweetest, nicest and undoubtedly the most beautiful witch in school. It will go well. She wants to have a good time too. He made sure he had money; that his hair was as neat as he could get it and that his clothes were all the right way 'round. Upon leaving Gryffindor Tower he'd almost forgotten the dream entirely and boldly set out to find Ginny.

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The Great Hall had surely never looked more amazing than tonight, Harry thought. With the stately stone gleaming, the deep red table cloths on the many round tables, and candles softly lighting his sweetheart beside him, he felt happier than ever before. The day had gone splendidly and he'd had to ask Hermione to excuse him for another few hours at least so he could spend more time with Ginny. It appeared though that Ron and Hermione had had another fight over something- they were sitting at opposite sides of the table glaring at each other. Harry chose to ignore it for now. Tonight was dedicated to the heavenly woman at his side.

His blissful daze was abruptly broken by a tremendous crash. Harry spun around in his chair knocking both him and it to the floor. Hissing whispers broke out, before being abruptly hushed by the sight of one, appallingly tall, pale, snake-eyed man standing in the entrance of the Great Hall. Harry spluttered breathlessly from the floor as Voldemort walked into Hogwarts.

Dumbledore stood abruptly. "Tom."

"Dumbledore," he returned as he looked around the hall. He caught sight of Harry quickly and began stalking over. Dumbledore interrupted his approach- Fawkes had flamed the Headmaster just before Harry. Dumbledore raised his wand and demanded, "Why are you here?"

"You really intend to duel me here, Dumbledore? It would be so easy for someone to get hurt."

"I have no choice if you intend to attack my students."

"Odd as it may seem, tonight I am not after Harry Potter. Nor do I intend to attack anyone, so long as no one impedes me."

The Headmaster raised an eyebrow, "Then what is your business here tonight, Tom?"

Voldemort looked pointedly away from Dumbledore, effortlessly catching Harry's eyes and spoke directly to him. "I must discuss a snake with Potter."

A slow blink was all the expression Dumbledore allowed his surprise. "Harry, do you know which snake Tom is interested in discussing?"

"Yes, sir." Harry said warily. Whatever Voldemort wanted with his snake- it would not be good for Harry.

"Then perhaps, Tom if I could have your Wizard's Oath that you make no attempt do anything that may harm anyone in any way- physically, magically, or mentally, nor kill anyone tonight, you might have your discussion. I cannot permit you to leave with Harry, of course.

"Of course." Voldemort sneered. "Very well. Do you have any other terms to the conversation?"

"Yes. You also may not abduct anyone from this castle."

"Very well, Dumbledore," he hissed and slowly raised his wand upright before him so it pointed to his own face. Harry took a brief moment to look around. So many pale faces, even among the Slytherins. The attending professors all were holding their wands, though not directly at Voldemort. He snapped his gaze back as Voldemort began to speak.

"I swear by my magic that I shall not purposely harm or kill any on Hogwarts grounds tonight in any way physically, magically or mentally; save in the event that I should be attacked while here tonight. Neither shall I forcefully remove any person from Hogwarts tonight. I do so willingly bind myself, so mote it be. "

Harry was shocked when Dumbledore gestured him forward. "You may speak of the snake then, Tom."

Voldemort was silent for several moments. The slight frown was the first sign all night that the name bothered him, but it could, Harry was sure it would; seem to anyone else that it was about Voldemort's distain of speaking to Harry. He wondered what Voldemort would do about so many people hearing his real name. He blinked when Voldemort spoke. "_You speak Parseltongue; do you not, Harry Potter?" _

Harry nodded cautiously_. "Yes."_

"_Then we shall speak in it." _Harry was rather disturbed by the civility in Voldemort's tone and, not knowing what to say, simply nodded again. _"Where is the snake?"_

"_Why do you want to know?" _Harry asked defiantly, ignoring the hushed whispers beginning all around them.

"_I want your snake."_ Harry felt the blood leave his face.

"_What for?"_ he spluttered feeling ill again. Surely not… He wouldn't come all the way here just for _that_, would he?

Voldemort glowered disdainfully at him. "_You did receive that memory, did you not_?" It was not really a question.

It seems he really would. It was all Harry could do not to vomit again as he was confronted by such a poignant reminder. _"Yes,"_ he choked out.

"_You know, then, what I want the snake for."_

"_Oh..." _he said inanely._ "Why my snake though? Why not stick to your snake_?" Harry tried to be defiant in the face of certain… something, doom maybe- utter disgust certainly. He did not want to give his 'snake' to Voldemort. No way.

A pale finger pointed at him accusingly. _"Your snake got Nagini pregnant. She refuses to have sex with me now."_

Confirmation, Harry thought dazedly, urgh! He struggled to remain standing, he wanted to fall over and die of disgust and some small amount of shame. Voldemort's snake was now pregnant with Harry's snake babies… He clapped a hand over his mouth as he gagged, swallowing back his rising gorge. _"What if it doesn't want go with you?"_

Voldemort raised a thin, hairless brow. _"What if it does, Harry Potter? Call it out- let us see". _When he saw that Harry was not immediately intending to retrieve the snake he spoke again._ "I will have that snake. I am offering you a chance to hand it over peacefully. If you do not… I know where your friends live. Besides, surely you believe that your snake is loyal enough to choose you. What do you have to lose simply by letting me ask?" _He stood smugly before Harry as Harry clenched his fists. Harry knew his snake didn't like to obey him. He also knew that his snake thought Voldemort was nice. Still, there was no way he'd put his cock above his friends. He undid the spells on his pocket and pulled out the white snake. Wrapped around his hand, it raised its head excitedly when it scented Voldemort. It hissed delighted nothings when it located him. Voldemort stepped forward to greet the snake. Harry stepped back, instinctively trying to step away from danger. Voldemort stopped for a moment, scowling.

"_Give me the snake so I can speak to it."  
>"You can speak to it from there."<br>"Now," he hissed angrily, wand hand twitching.  
>Harry hissed angrily but stepped forward to allow Voldemort to take it.<br>"Very good, Potter." He said dismissively before greeting the snake. Harry growled._

"_You smell so nice!" The white snake hissed excitedly. "I'm so happy to see you". Harry frowned darkly at this._

"_You first comment on my smell?" Voldemort was amused. Annoying as this confrontation with both Dumbledore and Potter was, it would be worth it if he left with the snake._

_The snake gave off an aura of slight embarrassment. "I didn't see you right away, but I knew my mate was here when I smelled your scent."_

"_You call me your mate?" _Voldemort asked, feeling laughter rising at the snake's impudence. Harry felt like vomiting again and backed up as Voldemort began to stroke the snake."_Yes, you and I are mates, I carried your egg and you carry mine." _Both Voldemort and Harry stiffened and stared at the snake.

"_What do you mean," _Voldemort looked the snake directly in the eyes_, "By saying that I carry your egg?" _

The snake blinked, confused._ "You smell like you carry my egg. Can't you feel it?" _Voldemort stood stock still and Harry wondered if it was possible to AK yourself. Voldemort was pregnant with his baby. Eye twitch… Come on Harry, don't faint he encouraged himself. You've got to convince your cock not to go. Just don't think about anything else, focus on that. Harry swayed and Dumbledore caught his elbow.

"My boy, are you alright?" he asked quietly. Harry nodded grimly, focusing himself. Voldemort had yet to say anything.

"_You are quite sure, serpent?"  
><em>It nodded,_ "Aren't you pleased?" _it asked, uncertainly_. "You said you were willing to mate with me…"_

Voldemort looked down at the snake._ "No, I cannot say I am pleased," _he began_."But I shall not harm my heir." _Harry wondered if hell was freezing over. Voldemort was willing to have a baby? Voldemort was going to have his baby? The room seemed a little dark around the edges and he leaned more heavily on Dumbledore's supporting hand. He missed Voldemort actually asking the snake if it would go with him. He did however hear the snake respond positively.

He stood straight and stepped forward. _"I will let you borrow my snake then, since it wants to go with you. It is still my snake- I will want it back."_ Harry declared, trying past his disgust to glare fiercely.

Voldemort stared disdainfully at him. _"Fine Potter, I will be taking the snake tonight though_." Harry felt ill again. _"You have your mind firmly stuck in the gutter, don't you?" _Harry did not know how to respond to that.  
>He cleared his throat, <em>"You won't be attacking my friends then?"<br>"No, Potter, I will keep my word."_ Voldemort paused before asking, _"What is your snake's name?"  
><em>Harry blinked, mouth falling open, _"What?"_ Did he hear that right?  
><em>"What is the snake's name?"<em> Voldemort repeated irritably.  
><em>"Oh, err, it doesn't have one."<br>"No wonder it was so happy when I asked it to come with me. Never mind Potter," _he hissed holding up a hand as Harry opened his mouth_. "I shall come up with a suitable name for the snake and will inform you later." _And with that he suddenly left, doors slamming shut behind him.

Harry pulled his arm free away from Dumbledore and sat down at his table, his head in his hands. That seemed to be the prompt for everyone to begin shouting at each other about what just happened. Harry felt the Headmaster's hand rest gently on his shoulder. "Thank you my boy, for giving up your pet. That may have saved many lives tonight. When you feel up to it, please feel free to come up to my office and tell me what was said. I've had a fondness for Gummy Newts recently." Another pat and Dumbledore left for the Professor's table. Many students began leaving their tables to talk before suddenly being called to attention by the Headmaster.

"This was an expected event and alarming to everyone, I understand if you are worried but please be reassured. The wards would have prevented Lord Voldemort from ever reaching the castle if he had intended to harm anyone within them. It seems he was here for a personal matter and has left without casting any spells. You shall have another half hour to speak and eat here and then you shall be required to return to your dorms promptly. You will be escorted by your Heads of House. I hope you had a good day, and please take this as a warning. Voldemort and his Death Eaters are capable, dangerous wizards and witches. Our guards must not be allowed to fall even when our enemy appears quiet." He sat down, and everyone began speaking again.

Ginny looked traumatized, Hermione looked worried and Ron was furious. "How dare he take your pet?" Harry raised a hand from his face.

"Please, not right now. I can't deal with anything right now." Ron sat back and bit his lip. He still looked angry for Harry's sake but was willing to wait if Harry really needed to.

Hermione reached around Ginny and put her hand on Harry's shoulder. "Would you like to leave?"

Harry agreed and tiredly stood up. He briefly put a hand on Ginny's back and gave her a feeble smile. "Goodnight, Ginny. I had a great day, I hope you did too." She smiled hesitantly back.  
>"I did. Goodnight, sweet dreams."<br>"Sweet dreams."

With that Hermione pulled him through the crowds to the Head table. She whispered to Professor McGonagall. The Professor looked at Harry and nodded.  
>"Well done, Mr. Potter, goodnight."<p>

Hermione swept him away, past muttering portraits, through the corridors and up the staircases to Gryffindor tower. She gave him a brief hug at the dorms and he collapsed on his bed. He fell asleep trying not to think about Voldemort having his baby or giving his penis a nickname.

_Page break page break page break page break page break page break page break page break._

End Chapter.

What should Voldemort name Harry's snake? Please review and tell me what you think.


	9. Chapter 9: Changing the World

_Disclaimer: This is fan fiction. That means I possibly own the plot, the snake, its eggs, the character interactions, and not a whole lot else. That also means I do not own Harry and Co. I am not making any money from this._

_Warnings: A great deal of sexual stuff including but not necessarily limited to: masturbation, future bestiality with a snake, male Veela, slash of the male on male variety and heterosexual relations._

_Parseltongue is generally italicized, except for situations where the only speech happening is parseltongue._

_10/12/12, 11/2/12, 12/26-27/12_

**A Snake's Mistake**

Chapter Nine: In which the Snake discovers what it is and Harry discovers he has what he always wanted.

_Nearly half an hour after Voldemort left the castle, on the way to Gryffindor Tower._

Harry numbly followed Hermione back to Gryffindor tower. She didn't try to talk to him, which he was grateful for. He was very busy trying not to think about the fact Voldemort had just stolen his member. He was rather disturbed by the fact that Voldemort was pregnant. He was dazed by the idea that Voldemort was pregnant with his baby. He was going to be a father to a human baby or at least it would probably be human… or would it be half snake? He shivered as he imagined a pale, scaly baby with green snake eyes and messy black hair clutched in Voldemort's skinny, scaly arms. He shuddered as he remembered just how scaly Voldemort was. He had scales everywhere, even on his cock! Harry leaned against the wall and tried not to be sick.

"Harry?"

He looked up, hand clasped over his mouth as he swallowed. "Hmm?" He felt it was better if he didn't open his mouth.

"Are you feeling sick?"

He frowned; he wasn't feeling sick so much as sickened by the visions of naked Voldemorts stalking through his mind. He vocalized an affirmative hum to her past his hand.

"Ill sick or did Voldemort say something that bothered you?"

He held up two fingers to indicate the latter.

She looked at him for a moment. "If it is negative thoughts that are bothering you, then a cheering Charm might help, should I try it? Then after you get to bed, I'll go to Madame Pomfrey and get a Stomach Soother and a dose of Dreamless Sleep."

That sounded pretty good to him, if she thought it would help he'd certainly try it. He made another agreeable sound.

She took out her wand from her sleeve, where apparently she had sewn in elastic bands to keep the wand in. He made a mental note to try that. Keeping his wand in his pockets was asking for trouble (he tried not to think of Mad-Eye's story about blasting off buttocks with a badly stored wand) but he hadn't found a better way before.

"Bono animo es!" She spoke firmly and made a little jab at him with her wand.

He stepped back, a bit dazed. He blinked and smiled at Hermione. She was such a great friend, a really life saver. He strongly felt the need to express his gratitude. "Hermione, have I told you lately just how much you mean to me? You are such an awesome friend. I would probably be dead a dozen times over if not for you, and you help me understand the homework, and you go out of your way to make sure I'm happy even though it takes time away that you could have been spending with Ron, and…"

She interrupted him there, "Harry, stop. I am glad to hear your appreciation of me and you make a good friend too, but right now we should get back to Gryffindor before everyone else comes back and starts asking what happened, ok?"

He beamed at Hermione's slightly flushed face, "Ok, so long as you know." He hummed quietly to himself as she grabbed his wrist and started leading him again. He fell back into his thoughts, although the spell had cast a very differently light on them. He was going to have a family. Admittedly, before now he had included older adults like Sirius as parent-type figures and Ron and Hermione as immediate family and the rest of the Weasleys as his extended family. Now he included Ginny as his girlfriend, Ron and Hermione are still there, Sirius was gone (the spell hurried his mind along past that idea). His idea of family was currently undergoing modification as he got used to the idea of the baby snakes as his kids and his new, probably mostly human baby and then Voldemort had to be put in there somewhere… Given that Ginny, as his girlfriend, had occupied the potential slot as mother-of-my-kids but now Voldemort actually was mother-of-his-kid… There was some conflict in his family schema. He hummed thoughtfully. He wondered if he could get visitation rights worked out with Voldemort. He was going to have a little boy or girl to teach how to fly, how to identify Darke Plots and when to interfere with them… His thoughts wandered off down a rabbit hole into a bright future were Voldemort had retired from Dark Lording, and Harry and the as-of-yet unnamed-child stood boldly together as they stood for Light and Justice and Truth and, and other stuff.

He walked into Hermione and got a face full of soft, frizzy brown hair. "Hmm?" he asked the hair.

"Harry!" Hermione jumped away, startled. It seemed he wasn't the only one lost in thought. "Oh, Harry." She turned to the portrait of the Fat Lady, "Amor." The woman raised an eyebrow at the pair of students before her and she wondered as her portrait swung open what those two would get up to on Valentine's Day night.

_Just outside of Hogwarts, moments after Voldemort dramatically stormed out of the castle._

Voldemort was stunned. He really had no idea what to think. He stood outside Hogwarts for a minute trying to understand what he had just been told. It was not that he did not understand the words- the snake genuinely believed that his mating with it had left him pregnant. But the idea that it could be true- he knew full well that his snake could detect changes in his health before he could and with great accuracy. Did Potter's snake possess the same abilities? He would have to ask Nagini.

He strode purposely down the slope towards the road that led to the main boundary gate. It would take him approximately fifteen minutes at this rate. For once he was not in a hurry to discover unknown truths. How very unlike him. He could blame it on this strange numbness that had overtaken him. He looked down at his hand as the snake gripped his wrist tightly and consciously relaxed his grip. While this snake of Potter's seemed to be unnaturally resilient to pain, it did experience discomfort.

It hissed happily at him, simply because he had noticed it and deliberately did something to make it feel better. His mate had come to take him back, his mate cared about him. How could anything be better? It was a decent night for late January, as he thought his owner's book-ink-female scented friend had called this time of year. And his mate has carrying him so he could look around at all the neat things instead of putting him in a pocket all day and being nice about something that he had done to make his mate unhappy. He wasn't really sure what his mate had expected though- his mate was part female and mating made babies. It didn't really matter now; his mate had an egg and wasn't going to get rid of it. How that would be accomplished he didn't know- an egg wasn't something to be rid of. It existed inside until it was time to lay, then was guarded for a short time until it hatched. A loose skin was something to be rid of- it was bothersome and dangerous to have something over your eyes. But an egg was a very easy thing to have- hardly a burden at all. Unless it was different for the standing ones? He didn't know. Would his mate tell him? His owner almost never spoke to him- just told him to be still, to be quiet, to stay in one spot. He would ask.

Snow crunched softly under his feet at he walked. An idly cast warming charm kept him at the perfect temperature- warm but in such a way that invigorating gusts of wind could still touch him with just a little nip. He loved magic- he really did. But even the most pleasant tangents couldn't hold his attention tonight. It wandered back to the 'egg' in his gut and beyond just the possibility of being pregnant… Why had his mind jumped to call the 'egg' his heir? And in front of Potter too! His mind to mouth filter had broken during those years he had spent wandering as a half ghost thing with no one to talk to but himself. He had managed so far not to reveal this, quite frankly, crippling loss to his followers by spending some time thinking over his speeches and the possible things that might happen in a meeting. But he had lost it when the snake had said that he, of all people- the dark lord himself, manliest of men (excluding his current snaky likeness- it was a phase, he already getting close to a potion to correct that), was pregnant… And by an animal no less. Despite his fondness for snakes (and his deliberately acquired disregard of society's rigid ideas towards sex and killing) he had no desire to create offspring with lower life forms. While by some standards non-humans were preferable to mudbloods, did that make up for his current dilemma? Would he become the laughing stock of the wizarding world for fathering a child upon a snake? (There was no way he was going to let it get out that he was the one pregnant- nope- he was going to hid it for nine months and have the baby call the snake mummy.) An idea came to him and thunderstruck, he paused for a moment, could something like this have been behind the Slytherin trait of Parseltongue? Was Slytherin's mother or father the snake? What kind of snake was it? Some kind of magical snake or one of those non-human beings like Naga? Naga were very reclusive, thought to be highly intelligent, very dangerous and quite magical. If Slytherin's mother or father had won the regard of a Naga, no wonder they had agreed to have a child with a non-human. Any offspring of that sort would be powerful for several generations and Naga being what they were- serpents who could look nearly human and any point in between- there would have been minimal shunning of the family for the introduction of an animalistic line to the family.

Could he pass the snake off as a Naga? He was certain he could transfigure the snake into a human shape- but how well could it act? He made a mental note of this on his mental blackboard 'o delightful plots- find a way to pass off snake as pregnant Naga.

His vaguely cheerful thoughts were disrupted by a questioning hiss. He looked down at the snake.

"Yes?"

"Why are you upset about the egg? It's not that much trouble right? You'll only carry it for a few weeks and then guard it until it hatches, so why are you upset?"

Voldemort paused, "If you are correct about my carrying an egg, then it will take much longer than that. Humans, my species, typically carry the egg for nine months and then must guard the hatchling for several _years_." He stressed this part while staring meaningfully at the snake.

"Years?" the snake gasped. "Why would it take years? Will my owner have to watch my eggs for years?"

"Humans have farther to develop than snakes to reach adulthood, and while it looks like most of it is simply size the most important part is the physical and mental development of the brain. If a baby human had an adult brain it would probably be able to take care of itself after only three or four years. However, the necessary skill of looking forward to anticipate what will happen based on one's actions doesn't develop completely until some time around sixteen, maybe. And, yes, if your eggs are part human, your owner may have to care for your eggs for some time. Did you leave my egg in his care?"

"Yes, my owner is very careful with the eggs- he likes them better than me." The snake wailed this last part, leaving Voldemort to look on in dismay.

"Why do you say that?" He hurriedly interrupted the snake's weeping.

It sniffled, (How did a snake sniffle, Voldemort wondered- is it some trait of the magic that made it?) "He traps me in his pocket and hardly speaks to me and almost never touches me and tries to stop me if I sneak away to find someone to mate with, and…"

"I see," Voldemort interrupted. "Why do you think he treats the eggs better?"

"He watches them and carries them carefully, and wonders whose eggs they are and has his ink smelling friend help him do everything right to take good care of them. He carries them where they will get sunlight and makes sure they don't get cold. He pets them sometimes and stares at them with a nice look in his eyes- he never looks nicely at me." The snake ended in a pathetic whine and looked up at Voldemort with large eyes.

"Does he dislike you so much? Why would he keep you if he didn't want you?"

"He doesn't like me at all. He wishes he didn't have me, although he doesn't tell his friends that. They think I am a toy, which is fun. I got to sort of mate with many humans and it felt really good. But he caught me and trapped me in his pocket." The snake paused, confused by this. "He makes no sense. He tries to keep me close by but he doesn't want me around."

"Where did you come from? Did he buy you from somewhere?"

The snake stopped looking around and stared straight up at him. "I don't know. The first thing I remember was my owner making me feel good, so I told him so. He stopped then and pulled me away from him which made me cold. He was surprised and angry but he put me back where I was and I was warm again, but he stopped making me feel good."

"Where did your first memory happen?" Voldemort felt he was close to figuring out this mystery.

"Umm," The snake concentrated. "I think it was in the shower. I don't remember much but my owner very well from that time but I think I remember white and water- so it must be the shower." The snake looked triumphantly up at him and waited hopefully for approval.

"Your earliest memory was of your owner pleasuring you in the shower? You said your owner did something to make you cold but you warmed up again when he put you back. Where did he take you from?"

"I was sticking out from between his legs… Where his penis should have been… Where did my owner's penis go? Maybe he would have liked me better if I could have played with his."

Voldemort was disturbed. As much as he might enjoy younger lovers thinking about his enemy's nether regions was generally a no-no to dark leaders everywhere. The was always the chance that a dark leader might be so overcome with desire that they make a deal with their attractive younger enemies to give up world domination for a deal with mutual benefits.

"As far as you know, you did not exist before then?"

The snake considered his possible lack of prior existence to that morning. "Yes." It said slowly. I don't remember anything before then and I never saw him with his own penis. Do you think that I could be his penis? Is that why he doesn't want me going off and having fun on my own?"

"It could be possible, but I do not intend to think any more about this right now. I will think about other things and we will get in a mood for sex."

"Yay!"

_Spells:_

'Bono animo es,' Latin, literally means cheer up.

I hope you enjoyed this chapter. Would you believe that at just under 3000 words, this chapter takes up nine pages with a 12 size font?

It seems the part from the sneak peek will be postponed for Ch 10.

Merry Christmas or Happy Holidays if you prefer that.


	10. Chapter 10: Duties to Slytherin

Duties to Slytherin

In some old families there exists a certain magic that allows the ancient paterfamilias, the first of the family line by that name, to continue to exist after their deaths in some fashion and offer his advice and wisdom to each successive generation. The Slytherin family line was one of these and had dwindled over the thousand years since Salazar had named himself Slytherin and started a family by that name and now only existed in the mutated, barely human form of Lord Voldemort.

Salazar was angry and desperate. His only surviving heir was nearly seventy years old, had nearly died four times now, only survived the last one by some of the foulest dark magic to ever exist and was even now debating whether or not he should have children. (Also, he looked like a snake in all the worst ways rather than the attractive ones.)

Or rather, whether he should continue to let the accidentally formed child resting in his extremely unwelcome womb continue to exist. He was leaning slightly towards the negative due to the simple fact that it is rather hard to take over a country while pregnant. Also, as a secondary factor, that the child was fathered by his half-blooded nemesis and therefore less desirable than a child created with a full blooded wizard (or even more preferably, witch) parent.

Voldemort was resting peaceably in his bed after a long, destructive tantrum over being pregnant (by his nemesis no less). He had no idea that the paterfamilias enchantment rested in his blood. He had been raised by Muggles and as the enchantment was rarely spoken of even by purebloods, there was simply no way for him to know despite all of his knowledge of magic.

The thinning of the bloodline (through weakened magic rather than diluted magical genes) had made it more and more difficult for Salazar to contact his decedents and it was only now that the last ditch attempts of the man's magic managed to reach his sole heir because Voldemort was contemplating not merely the death of one of his own blood, but the death of the _only_ other being of his blood and his own child to boot. (Of course, now that he had made contact the enchantment could re-anchor itself in the incredibly powerful magic of the dark lord.)

Salazar let himself though the sleep-weakened mental barriers of the dark lord and into his dreams.

Voldemort became aware that he was being watched, although he could not say how long he had been sitting at his desk working on his endless paper work. (Have to organize his men, make sure those unemployed had food, shelter and clothes so they didn't get caught attempting to steal, plan where to attack, when, what message he was trying to send and if an attack would send it, keep track of who would need to be made an example of soon and so forth.) He set his pen aside and looked up. He choked. Was that really Salazar Slytherin sitting on his study sofa? Certainly the face looked something like the stature that adorned the chamber of secrets.

Salazar shifted to face him, placing a sheaf of paper upon the coffee table. He answered the unspoken question in a rather imperious manner, "It is indeed I, Salazar Slytherin, your ancient paterfamilias. I have finally managed to appear before you because you would damage the first fruit of your body- the only offering you have ever made to your line!"

Voldemort was still rather shocked but resented the slight to his sense of familial duty. "Is not the preservation of the Wizarding world worth more to you than the halfblooded bastard child carried by a half blooded bastard?"

"The government established may be failing in its duties to protect the Wizarding World, but each ancient family's first duty is towards its own continuation, then to the continuation of the other families, and through that to the continuation and protection of the rest of the populous."

Salazar continued, "While you may be half blooded and a bastard son besides, you are the strongest wizard in your line for more than four hundred years and are possessed of a most brilliant mind and noble ambition when you are not wallowing in madness. Not only that but you are mine and that more than makes up for the failings in your parents duties towards you. That being said, the child within you is mine too and is most promising as it hails from two of the strongest wizards of their generation in the entire world (and as I am dead I might tell this more readily than most living magical entities) with intelligence coming from both sides."

Still flushed with both pleasure from the complement by his idolized ancestor and anger over the insult that implied he was insane, he was distracted by the insinuation that Potter was worthy of him and equal besides in the intelligence he passed down. "Potter is hardly equal in intelligence to myself! I am told that he is hardly better than a dunce in most subjects and that in the couple that he does acceptably well in it is only because he is either favored disgustingly or his professors are of the dimmest ever to disgrace Hogwart's halls."

Salazar fixed his descendant with a gimlet eye. "And whose fault is that, my dear but entirely-too-eager-to-curse-things descendent? You are most at fault for Hogwart's diminished reputation! While you certainly might have been a worthy Professor the fact that you were not hired did not give you the right to curse the position. Lack of adequate education is one of the greatest things weakening the modern wizard, far more than the blood of those born from mundanes!"

Voldemort was shocked. His ancestor, in whose name he stove to kill all mudbloods, was saying that eradicating the mudbloods was not as important as teaching them?

Salazar threw his hands up, "Yes, my half blooded descendent, even the mudbloods might eventually be worthy of marrying to purebloods if they are powerful and intelligent. Was not my own line improved by an infusion of mudblood? You would hardly be so powerful had your mother snared some inbred wizard. Instead, she lay with a squib's descendent and the latent traces of magic in his blood were revived in your creation. Certainly, the breeding should be done carefully and tests should be done to make sure of at least some traces of magic in the blood but that is hardly a great difficulty compared to finding a pureblood to marry whom one's family has not bred with in the last hundred years. Had I been able to contact you before, I certainly would not have advised killing your father. He may have been valuable breeding stock as his line had been proven in you."

Voldemort could hardly believe what he was hearing and yet… The fact that he could almost believe what this wizard was saying was surely proof that he was Slytherin. Who else could be so persuasive? He could not be merely dreaming as he would never have come up with the idea of breeding his muggle father to weak witches in hopes of revitalizing failing bloodlines.

"How did you come to be in my mind, Slytherin? You spoke of attempts to contact me? In what manner?"

"All bloodlines must start in a single man, or occasionally woman. During my time a spell became exceedingly famous, one that would allow that man or woman to remain aware of the world even after death and in contact with the family they began in order to guide and advise them. However, it must be individually activated by some stressor. If a particular sort of stressor- in your case, for example, the existence of your child whom you were planning to get rid of- did not occur then I could not speak to them. And as a bloodline grew weak it would take a greater and greater stressor to trigger the spell."

"The bloodline had grown so weak by the time you were born it had nearly lost the ability to hold my awareness to the living world. It was only when you came to Hogwarts that I started becoming stronger as you started seeking my remnants in the corporeal world. Had you not, it would have been the end of the Slytherin line altogether. Of course, you could have started your own bloodline had the spell ended and you produced offspring. I do think that Slytherin is a much better family name than Voldemort, personally. Also, you would have needed to find the spell and cast it to remain in the world as I have done. But you did seek me, and you acted in the family name, however misguidedly. In doing so the spell slowly, so very slowly, began to regain its strength. And your magic had a stressor- you planned to force it to destroy your only offspring. It reached out and the family spell reached back, releasing me and re-anchoring itself into your blood."

The reason that your magic could reach out was, even though you call yourself a lord, you have not done what a Slytherin must to become Head and Lord of the Slytherins. Your magic could reach out because you are still an Heir of the Slytherin family. I am your Lord, and while there is little I may truly do to force you to change your ways, as I am no longer a living man, I can allow your magic to rebel against you if you try and use it to kill your child. And, Potter is the Heir of the Heir of Slytherin by your own doing! He speaks Parseltongue and carries the mark of your magic every bit as strongly and more so than if he were your son. He is worthy to be your consort! He is powerful, of reasonable intelligence, somewhat charismatic, from a wealthy family and he would love your child, even though it will be born of the same man who murdered his parents. Neither his mind or magic have been well trained but that is more a fault in his upbringing and teachers than in himself. He has never had anyone to guide him. At least you had your fellow students to offer advice for as long as you would take it. His classmates are either so intimidated or so blinded by the boy's reputation that no one, not even his Gryffindor Head of House will offer him direction. The only one who does try to aid him is a mudblood herself and untaught in wizarding ways. And so many of his troubles come from you!

"He has now blessed your womb with his child, however unknowingly. You cannot rid yourself of the child, for your magic will fight you for its life. You cannot kill its father for your magic will recognize him also as both your son and consort and fight you on that. Now what will you do, my descendent? If you wish to conquer England, do so. If you wish to reform what and how Hogwarts teaches, do it! But do it quickly. When the child arrives, I expect you to be its primary care taker. And as long as I am Lord Slytherin, your blood and magic will bow to my will."

And yet, my will shall be a light yoke to your neck, my son, flesh of my flesh, bone of my bone, magic of mine. You say you wish to protect the Wizarding World. Then so shall I agree to this. And your first steps must be to conquer quickly and make peace. The Muggles are growing more and more watchful every day. As your war spills over, they see things they cannot understand. The majority may explain it away but the most dangerous ones do not. They wait for their enemy to expose themselves. Any, my son, you have made yourself their enemy and a dangerous one at that. I know that you have tried to keep yourself somewhat abreast of their weaponry. You know they might smite the cities of their enemies easily as you might destroy a house. Once you become king and have all of Wizarding England behind you, you shall have a seat of power to protect the wizards from danger. Until then you must lie as low as the snake you claim as your standard. I shall watch for you where you cannot yet see for yourself, in the workings of the Muggle government. But you must find ways to gain allies there for yourself, before they grow tired of the foolish, crudeness of the Ministers of Magic and seeks to end our government."

"Now, wake! Record these words before your mind looses them to sleep and dreams. Wake!"

"Ah," Voldemort woke up with a gasp of shock. He gripped his chest, feeling the rapid beating of his heart within his skeletal chest. He sat blinking in the dark, listening to his panting and he heard Nagini rouse herself.

"Master, what has alarmed you? I have sensed nothing near."

"A dream, Nagini. And an important one, I fear, one that may turn my war for the worse. But it may also turn for the better, now that I have fewer targets to split my attention between."

Their conversation woke the white snake that had been sleeping with them. It hissed in sleepy confusion, "What is going on?"

"Nothing for you to worry about, I simply must go to my office and write my dream down. I will return in a few minutes. There is still most of the night before us to sleep peacefully in." He soothed both of them, and it was the work of mere minutes for he had worked out a spell years ago that would animate a quill to write the thoughts from his very mind, no speaking necessary.

He returned to bed, only slightly colder than when he had left it and the three of them went back to sleep. Voldemort, however, did not fall into a peaceful sleep but into yet another peculiar dream.

He dreamt that he stood before a much younger Slytherin who began to scold him for his long dereliction to the duties of his family. This Slytherin resolved to punish him and did so in a most peculiar way. It somehow involved a naked and embarrassed Potter, several lust hexes and being slapped in the face by his ancestor's penis.

The next morning, Voldemort woke to grumpy snakes who complained he had kept waking them with gasps and moans. He felt grumpy, waking up with a cold, sticky mess in his pants and an erection to boot after such a humiliating dream.

Chapter Notes:

Started - and continued 8/4 and 8/5. Consists of 2,470 words over five pages.

An extended version of his second dream will soon be posted on another fan fiction site that treats mature rated stories in a more kindly way: _Archive of Our Own_ under the author name: AzureGryphon.

I have a few other stories there already (which will not be posted here at all) but I do intend to continue updating my less explicit stories here as well.


	11. The Handling of Snakes by Severus Snape

The Handling of Snakes

By Severus Snape

Certified Potions Master, Professor of Potions at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, Current Head of Slytherin House

The last student scurried out of the classroom and Snape slammed the door behind the dawdling dunderhead.

He released a frustrated sigh and retired through the door of in his office to his private rooms. He sank onto his leather covered chair in front of the fireplace and groaned.

"Why did I become a glorified baby sitter again? Oh yes, because you had the stupidity to sell yourself into slavery to a pair of old squabbling madmen, old chap. They both want you to spy on the other so you work in the domicile of one to make it more likely you will learn something the one might desire to know and at the same time make it easier to report to the other. Meanwhile, you have access to children to brainwash over to the dark side and a not inconsiderable fund for research which you can use to make the potions your master demands of you in what little free time you have after classes are over, grading is done and patrols are complete. Not only that, but as Professor of Potions of a school and with no apprentice to do the task you must make a certain minimal donation to the quantity of potions needed for the infirmary wing."

"And they ignore that you are a young man, full of needs left unfulfilled by your own hand, and give you no time to seek someone to slake them with."

"Oh, Lily, you would have been a magnificent wife. You would have been just as busy as I and independent enough that you would not be lonely yet when our spare time overlapped you would have put your passions to conquering my needy flesh. Oh, Lily of the Glorious Fire Hair, Lily of the Blazing Killing Curse Eyes, how I long for you even now as you languish in your grave and I in my stony dungeon."

A sudden wiggle from his pocket distracted him from his bitter soliloquy. He recalled the snake that several suddenly unstable potions had distracted him from after establishing who its owner was and drew it from his robe pocket. It coiled docilely around his hand and he examined it as he might any live specimen which might prove useful as ingredients.

He took its head in hand and examined the head shape, the number, size and shape of scales upon it and determined it to be not native to Europe. It was a fine specimen of a snake, smoothly tapering from narrow head to tail in a stout, muscular way. The white color seemed unusual but the shape of the snake seemed normal enough. Perhaps some sort of python although the shovel shaped head indicated a burrowing species. Conjuring a shallow pen of sorts in which he placed the snake, he summoned a mouse from his lab and carefully used it to tease the snake to see how it attacked. It was a constrictor and he nodded at the confirmation to his suspicions of its python like nature. It was busy swallowing the mouse and he hastened to the snake section of his book shelves. He carefully inked the snake's head pattern on a removable section thicker than most and placed it flat just inside the cover. Closing the large book he set it down and cast a finding spell on it. Provided it was a natural snake this should enable him to learn the basics of the species.

The book popped open on its own initiative, displaying a page from the American snakes section, specifically the Mexican Burrowing Python. Despite the name, there was some doubt as to its python status although it had been placed under that label thanks to its pelvic bones vestiges. Regardless of its species name, the most important part is that it would not naturally grow much over a meter in length, which, as it was also non-venomous, made it acceptable as a pet by the revised Hogwarts Charter of 1900.

Humph, Snape though to himself, if Potter does come up with a pass for it I will not be able to keep it from him. Pity, he really doesn't deserve to own such a fine example of serpenthood. He had walked back over to the pin and watched the snake restlessly move about its enclosure despite the lump discernable in its midsection.

"A bit excitable aren't you, snake?" He inquired of the snake and was astonished to see it look towards him as though it had heard him. "Can you hear me then?" It kept looking at him and he squatted beside the pen. It slithered over to where he was, staying low and non-threatening as it approached his position. "I wonder how that can be…" He knelt and with his upper body straightened for better resonance, sang some notes so see if the snake responded to pitches. It wiggled in response, a deucedly odd response for a snake. He raised an eyebrow, thinking, I have never seen one wiggle before unless gripped and afraid for its life. It can hear though in a way the normal snake cannot it seems. He cast a spell that ought to make an illusion of the creature's ear structure for him to see, that is if it had one. (The spell was usually used by healers to check for ear damages as a separate spell could be cast to highlight damage.)

The snake had ears after a fashion, though not external. After some more spells he identified many unnatural traits such as eyelids, a doubled genital structure- male and female parts were present, a strange muscular structure in the female entryway not found in reptiles but in mammals, and when he picked up the snake and asked it rhetorically if it had any secrets it wanted to share discovered not only could it hear human speech but understand it when the end of its tail abruptly turned into a second head. Now, four golden eyes stared at him from the white serpent.

"What has Potter done to you? Or were you like this when he got his hands on you?"

It hissed unintelligibly in response. Perhaps it expected him to understand? He told it that he could not understand hisses but a nod or head shake would be able to indicate positive or negative responses.

"Has Potter, your owner, cast spells on you?"

The serpent nodded with both heads so Snape began testing for different spell types. He considered what he was seeing. Had Potter been using a live snake as a sex toy? There was really no other use for many of these spells, among them a vaginal cleaning, lubing and stretching spell that would allow easy entrance to nearly any penis of reasonable size. (It couldn't cope with a giant's penis for example but humans of any size would be able to penetrate the snake with out any difficulty or harm to the being or animal it was used on.) Another spell that had taken some consideration was discovered to be a strange spell that allowed a limb unusual sensitivity and made it into a erogenous zone similar to a penis. Fortunately it only activated when the target was aroused, allowing normal use of the limb during other activities, although it could be canceled any time as needed. It was popular among lesbians or more adventurous husbands for use by their wives and was often cast on fingers. This spell encompassed the entire snake essentially making it a living penis!

"Has Potter been using you for a sex toy?" He continued his interrogation. It responded in the negative and he followed with, "Have other people been using you as a sex toy?" A positive response. "But you belong to Potter, correct?" Another positive response accompanied by a flat hiss. "Do you mind being used that way?" A negative response.

He considered for a moment. "Do you enjoy it?" It nodded vigorously. He smirked. If Potter was whoring his pet out why not enjoy it?

He cast and anchored several cleaning spells on the snake, preparing it for play.

"I am going to start by manually stimulating you." And stimulation it was! The snake had never felt anything so good from hands alone. The strong fingers stroked and massaged, caressed and probed all over its body. Sometimes the man would slip a finger into the serpents vent, stimulating its unusual feminine structures pleasantly or into its mouths which was covered by the penile stimulation simulator spell. A hemipenis extended from its opening and he ran light fingertips over that too, teasing the serpent. It writhed in his grasp, not in attempt to get away but because it did not have other ways to express its pleasure. He noted that when aroused the white scales of the snake turned a brilliant red color.

He teased it to orgasm within ten minutes simply with his talented hands. A spurt of semen shot from an extended hemipenis into his still clothed lap and it went limp in his hands. He allowed it to rest for a few minutes and watched the color fade from its scales before starting to stimulate the animal again. This time he started using his mouth with his hands to farther observe its reactions. He ran his tongue tip lightly along the serpents scaled body, alternating with tracing and full tongue licks before placing one of the snake's heads into his mouth and sucking it like a cock. He demonstrated some of the skills he had learned in service to the Dark Lord when he took the snake deeply into his throat without gagging. The snake was heavy and thick in his mouth, firmer than the spongy muscles of a cock but it was still shaped much the same way and he was well aware of spells to keep an air channel in his throat so he could blow a man without needing to pause for air. He experimented with how deeply he could take it and was rather intrigued by the depths that the snake could penetrate. He gulped it down until only a few inches remained outside of his mouth. He licked at the parts of the snake he could reach as the rest extended down his throat and the second head was gripped in one hand to prevent it from getting entirely swallowed.

The snake loved it, relishing the hot, wet heat of the man's mouth and throat. (Elsewhere, Harry was forced to retire to his bed behind very strong silencing charms where he experienced a very talented blowjob via his disembodied cock.) It hissed in ecstasy and wriggled in his throat. Snape pulled the snake part way out before swallowing it again, his esophagus clenching and relaxing around the snake with involuntary contractions. The snake had never been taken so deeply before (nor would it experience this with anyone else, Snape was really one of a kind). It discovered that the tube of the esophagus ended in a clenching sphincter and its head was pushed in. The muscle tightly gripped the neck, creating a delightful stimulation was it was pulled back through.

Snape orally stimulated one end of the snake and continued manually stimulating the other head until it orgamsed again, this time into his mouth. (The double ends of the snake resulted in the vent falling about halfway along its body rather than towards the tail end like it would be in a normal snake. Snape had pulled it back out when he felt the odd shape of a hemipenis extending into his throat so he could tease it with his tongue.) He tasted its fluids with all the attention of a scientist to a specimen and was mentally categorizing flavors of both the female mucus and male semen.

This time as the snake began recovering he gently placed it on a table and began undressing. He made a quick detour to his kitchen for a drink and returned teasing his penis as he walked. The snake had returned enough to its senses to be look around from its perch on the side table and saw the sight of Snape in all his erect glory approaching and was astonished and aroused at the impressive size of the trouser snake cupped in his hand.

It flopped over onto its back in mock fear and wrapped its tail around his wrist as he picked it up. He teased the serpent's opening until he could get both thumbs into it. He then slid the snake onto his cock like one might pull a slightly small sock onto a foot. It felt fantastic to the sex deprived man and he began to slide the serpent up and down on his cock, and, when he realized that it was not hurting the snake and in fact was very pleasurable for the animal, began thrusting harder into the snake's pussy.

He discovered that he could feel his fingers surprisingly well through the snake's body and began a more masturbation like movement, still sliding the snake up and down but also included more pressure and a few twists. It felt fantastic as the warm wet opening opened before his cockhead, clutching him tightly in its virginal channel (although he had no idea it had never been entered by more than a finger before) and he felt his orgasm arrive rather sooner than it normally did when he had no aids but his own hands. He yanked it down hard around his cock as he came, shooting his seed deep into the fertile womb.

He was gentle as he pulled the over stimulated and exhausted serpent off his prick. He smiled as he relaxed into his chair, prick resting on one thigh as he stroked the snake draped over the other.

It would not be until some hours later that he would remember that falling asleep naked and sweaty on a leather chair was a bad idea when he was forced to unstuck himself. Even so the over all experience was very pleasant and he made sure to enjoy the snake for as long as he had it. On of his more interesting ideas involved shrinking the snake and wearing it on his cock as he went around his teaching duties. The soft, wet internals of the snake tempted him into stroking himself behind his desk as he graded essays while the students were involved in the quizzes he gave students before allowing them to actually attempt to brew a potion. (Those with worse grades usually needed more supervision later.) Only silencing spells and his best poker face allowed him to keep his dignity as he masturbated in class.

It was really a pity, Snape reflected, that Potter had managed to get permission to have his snake back. The free labor of the punished Potter and the sexual gratification from the snake had been very nice while it lasted.

i Began on 8/6/14, finished on 8/16/14. Consists of 2,514 words on five pages. /i

Reproduction:

Being pythons, these snakes are egg layers. They average four eggs per clutch, usually laid March to April. The young hatch in May. Little or no parental care is given to newborn snakes.


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